


The epic highs and lows of high school gridball

by lynnaria



Category: Stardew Valley (Video Game)
Genre: Actually it gets sad at one point so, Compulsory Heterosexuality, Fluff and Humor, M/M, just kinda chaotic tbh
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-01-30
Updated: 2021-02-11
Packaged: 2021-03-16 05:22:54
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 9,704
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28951122
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lynnaria/pseuds/lynnaria
Summary: mlm actually just stands for moron loving moron
Relationships: Alex/Sam (Stardew Valley)
Comments: 6
Kudos: 26





	1. The first one

It’s no secret to the town that the new farmer is an attractive woman. And Alex has made an effort to tell everyone he sees that he has dibs on the girl. He recalls a time when he caught Leah making eyes at her, from across the town square while she looked at the bulletin board. He placed himself directly behind the farmer, blocking her from the other woman’s view. He turned to glare at the redhead, a scowl on his face. She had no choice but to leave the farmer alone after that.

He remembers seeing her chatting with Elliott, his stomach turning witnessing it. He throw a rock in the window of his shack by the beach, hoping the freezing autumn breeze blowing into his home would give him a cold. Maybe then, he’d learn his lesson.

The latest offender was Sam. Alex never liked the guy. He always thought that his cool demeanor only served to cover something else up, something more sinister. He witnessed the man, not once, but three times- standing outside of his home, playing phone games with the new farmer. He’d even done a kick flip in front of the girl... Alex considered him his biggest competition.

Today was the last straw. He had seen the farmer, along with both Sam and the carpenter’s son, Sebastian or whatever his name was, go to the mountains and enter a house. Alex stood at the base of the mountain, baffled by the occurrence. He carefully snuck closer to the house, peering in through the window. The carpenter didn’t seem to be working, and there was no sign of her husband, either.

This was getting worse by the second.   
  


The door was unlocked, thankfully. He turned the knob slowly and carefully, pushing it open. He tiptoed down the hallway, stopping at the base of the stairs once he hears someone talking.

“You enter a dark corridor. The only light available is a single torch at the very end of the hallway. You nearly trip over each other as you walk through it, not even able to see your own hands in the darkness. You hear a faint chirping in your left ear...”

Confused and bewildered by whatever this man is saying, Alex decides to just burst in unannounced.

The basement door swings open, slamming against the wall. Inside the room Alex sees Sam, the farmer and Sebastian all seated around a wooden table, a board game and an array of dice on the surface of it. They’re all looking directly at him, eyes wide in surprise. Sebastians face begins to glow red.

“What are you three doing in here?!” Alex asks accusingly. 

“Uh, playing a board game?” Answered Sam.

Alex crosses his arms. “A board game, huh?” He shakes his head. “Nice cover-up. Look, I don’t know what weird roleplay you two are trying to rope the new girl into, but I’m not having it.”   
  


Sebastian blinks rapidly, looking at the man in confusion. “I’m sorry?” He says.   
  
“Yeah, you should be sorry.” Alex replies.

“That’s not what I-“

“Imagine my shock,” Alex says, hands on his hips, “When I see the two of you-“ he points at each of them, one at a time, “leading the poor, innocent, farmer, into a dark basement of a vacant home.”   
  


“... I mean it’s not really ‘vacant’, my parents li-“

“Shut up, Sebastian.” Alex interrupts once again. “You two _disgust_ me. And I’d like to challenge both of you! Personally.”

The two friends look at each other in confusion before looking back at Alex. The gridball player rips off his jacket and tee, throwing it to the ground. He jabs a finger at them.

“Take off your shirts!” He says, taking up a fighting stance.

Sam carefully removes his jacket, folding it neatly. He tugs his t-shirt over his head, putting it on top of the pile. He stands up, mirroring Alex.

Alex looks over at the other man expectantly. “Well? What about you?”

“I am not going to do that.” Sebastian replies.

Alex rolls his eyes, dramatically sighing. “I guess it’s just you and me then, Sam.”   
  
He takes a stride forward, hands in fists. Sebastian and the farmer flinch, leaning away.

“Wait, can you do this outside actually? My mom would freak out if you damaged any on the drywall down here.” Sebastian asks.

“Oh yeah man, for sure.” Alex said, putting his arms down. He takes a step out of the door, which was still wide open. Sam steps over his seat, following him.

The two go upstairs, where the front door has also been left open. Sam closes it behind him. It’s a bit chilly out without his jacket on, but he persists. Alex gets in position again.

“Are you ready?!” He growled.

“Yeah!” Sam replied, in a tone that sounded closer to a person being asked if they wanted to ride an amusement park attraction rather than a person about to get in a fistfight.

“The winner gets to date the farmer chick!” said Alex.

“Okay!” Sam nods. He clenched his fists, bringing them to his chest, but pauses. “Um, wait, what?”

“You heard me! That new girl! We’re fighting for her.” He urges.

Sam stares at him, frowning. “But... What if I don’t see her like that?”

Alex drops his arms to his sides, exhaling. “C’mon, man, you’re making feel stupid here.”

“I don’t really get it...” he said, “Wouldn’t we just ask her which one of us she likes more?”

“If you thought that, why did you even come out here with me?” Alex asked, losing motivation by the second.

“I’ve been zoned out for the past 10 minutes, to be honest.” Sam replied, lowering his hands.

Alex sighed, pinching his temple. This guy sure was something.

“Do people actually do this? Fight over girls?” Sam questioned, in a manner so earnest it had to be sincere.

“Yeah! I mean... I see it in, like, movies and stuff.” The other man said, “Don’t you watch movies, Sam? Like, romantic ones, I guess?”

“Mmm...” Sam strokes his chin inquisitively, “I’m not huge on movies. I usually lose interest during the second half and just play games on my phone throughout the rest.”

“Oh.” This was so awkward. “I remember the guys in Twilight fought over the girl.”   
  
Sam looks at him, face blank.

“Haley made me watch it with her!” He adds, nearly stumbling over his words. “It wasn’t my choice, believe me.”

There’s a brief pause before Sam replies.

“Can I be Edward?” He asks.

Alex looks at him, eyeing him from head to toe. He was a bit taller than Alex, and way more lean. Not enough to be labeled as scrawny, but close. “Well, you certainly don’t have the figure to be Jacob.”   
  
Sam places a hand on his chest, feigning offense. Maybe that was kind of harsh.

The gridball player coughs awkwardly, trying to change the subject. “Anyways...I should probably go collect my lady then, considering you don’t want her.”

Sam’s expression changes to one of concern. He approaches the other man, standing by his side.

“No offense, but... are you sure she likes you like that?” He asked, leaning forward to look him in the eye.  
  


“What do you mean? Of course she does!” Alex assured him, “She’s constantly giving me fruit and stuff, and we talk almost every day.”   
  


Alex looks at the other man, gauging his reaction. An uneasiness grows in his chest when he doesn’t look convinced.

“I hate to break it to you... but I think she does that with just about everyone.” He said.

“What? What do you mean?” Concern leaked in Alex’s voice.  
  
“She does the same thing for me. And Sebastian. And even my mom, actually.” Sam replied.

“That- that doesn’t necessarily mean that she... y’know...” he argues weakly.

“I literally saw her give Emily a bouquet of flowers yesterday.”

“Huh?!” Alex utters, heartbroken. “She never gave me flowers!”

Alex looks down at the grass, frown deepening. Has she really been playing him this entire time? He was certain he had made his feelings for her clear.

“Y’know... I thought we had something. Me and the farmer girl, that is.” He murmured.

Sam stares at him for a few seconds. “Alex... Do you even remember what her name is?”

Alex’s silence is deafening.

“Dude...” is all that Sam can muster in response.

Alex searches the cavities of his, admittedly, small brain for a way to come back from all this. The only thing he is thankful for is the fact that Sam is probably too nice to tell anyone about this. Or he hopes, at least.

“...I’m getting kind of cold.” He says, changing the subject entirely.

“Same, let’s head back inside.”

The pair re-enter the house, walking past the front desk in the entryway. The wooden floor creaks as they walk by the stairs. Alex hears a voice, muffled through the door at the end of them. He reaches out, pushing Sam back, a finger to his lips. He wants to hear what they’re saying.

“-the most embarrassing thing ever. I cannot believe he walked in on me when I was fucking _DMing._ ” This voice clearly belonged to Sebastian.

“Oh, c’mon, it could be worse.” said a female voice in response.

“ _Could be worse?”_ Alex mouths, looking at Sam. Sam stares back at him, looking equally as confused.

“What do you mean by that?” Sebastian asks.

“You could have been naked, you know.” she replies.

Alex’s mouth goes agape. “ _Naked?!”_ He mouths.

“ _Naked?!”_ Sam mouths back.

“Wh- Why would I be naked?!” Sebastian said, sounding just as shocked at them.

He hears the farmer laugh. “That’s what you said to me! Remember? That one time I walked in on Harvey giving you a checkup at the clinic.”   
  
“Oh, yeah. Ugh, you still remember that? I hate how good your memory is, sometimes.”   
  


“What the fuck are they talking about?” Alex whispers to the blonde.

“I have no idea.” He whispered back.

“Why did you walk in on me, anyway? You don’t just burst into peoples homes and do that, do you?” Sebastian continues.

“Well, actually...”

Deciding he didn’t want to hear anymore, Alex walks back into the entryway and out the door. Sam follows.

He sighs. “I came here looking for a fight, and I got my heart broken. First, she gives a bouquet to Emily. Second, she has whatever the hell that conversation with Sebastian was.” Alex shakes his head. “I guess she’s just for the streets.”

“Doesn’t she own a farm though? We live out in the country.” Sam asks.

“That’s-“ The gridball player exhales through his nose, closing his eyes, “It’s an expression, Sam.”

“Oh...”

Alex stands with his arms crossed, body leaning against the windowsill. The glass was cold against his back.   
  
As if he heard his thoughts, Sam spoke up. “It’s kinda chilly out here...” 

“Yeah, I’m getting goosebumps.” He replied.

“Should we go grab our clothes?” Sam said.

Alex shook his head. “I probably shouldn’t go back in there.”   
  
“Maybe not.” Sam agreed, nodding. He approached the door, placing a hand on the knob. “I’m gonna go back down there” he added.

“Oh. Yeah, sure.” said Alex.   
  
He hears the door open and close next to him. Sighing, he straightens back up, walking away from the house. He puts his hands in the pockets of his jeans.

Today was a long day. He lost a lot. He lost a love. He lost a fight that never happened. And, most devastating of all, he had lost his prized letterman jacket. All he had left was hope for tomorrow to be better.


	2. chapter 2

Alex is outside watching Dusty today. The dog doesn’t do much these days, in his old age. He’s chewing on a worn out red ball, already lined with teeth marks. Alex wishes he could have a bigger space to play, but mayor Lewis insists that animals be kept in a fenced in area. His grandparents aren’t too keen on the dog being let in the house either, much to his dismay.

The mutt walks over to him, standing on his hind legs to get a better look at his owner. Alex pets his head, scratching behind his ears. Dusty sticks out his tongue in excitement.   
  


Too focused on his dog, Alex doesn’t notice Sam sneak up next to him. He has to clear his throat to gain Alex’s attention.

Alex blinks a couple times before responding. “Oh, hey.”

Sam stands in front him, Alex’s jacket draped over one arm, and a bouquet of sunflowers in his hands.   
  


“I brought your jacket back!” He shoves it towards him, “I had my mom wash it for you, too.”

“Thanks.” He replies, grabbing ahold of it. He glances at the flowers again, brows furrowed. Why did he have those?

Seeming to pick up the other man’s confusion, Sam speaks up. “Oh! Um, so,” he scratches the back of his neck. “I kinda felt bad for you, so I bought these to give you.”

The blonde extends it forward, offering it to him. Alex hesitates.

“Why did you get me flowers?” He asks.

“When I told you about Emily, you told me the farmer never gave you flowers. You sounded kind of disappointed, so I thought I could give you some instead.” He explained.

Alex gently takes hold of the bouquet. He rotates it from side to side, examining it in silence.

“I prefer tulips myself, but those weren’t in season, so...” Sam says, shrugging.

“When I said I wanted flowers...” Alex said, “I meant that I wanted them from a girl.”

“Does it make a difference?” He responds, head tilted to one side.

Alex pursed his lips, unsure how to answer. He meant no offense to the other man, but something about it felt wrong. Should he really be receiving flowers? From a guy? The implication of it gave him anxiety.

“I’m not a big fan of flowers, I guess.” He settles on, his words empty.

“Aw, really? I think they’re pretty nice.” Sam replies.

Alex stares down at the sunflowers. They are pretty nice.

“Oh! By the way,” Sam clasps his hands together, “Sebastian wanted me to let you know that you’re banned from coming to his house ever again.”

He chuckles awkwardly. “Yeah, I figured.”

They stand there for a few moments. Alex doesn’t look Sam in the eye, opting to stare at the river in the distance. He can feel the blonde’s stare boring into him. He feels his pulse quicken, as if he had just finished a strenuous workout. He grits his teeth, bearing it.

“Well, I’m gonna go take Vince to the beach. Get him out of my mom’s hair for awhile.” Sam says, finally turning away. “See ya!”   
  


Alex waves to the other boy, who is making his way to town square. Alex walks back to his grandparent’s house so he can put his clothing away.   
  


He hears his grandmother vacuuming the hallway as he steps in through the door. His grandfather isn’t in the living room watching TV, and he’s not in the kitchen eating. Must be taking a nap. It’s a good thing he can turn off his hearing aids whenever. Alex wishes he had that ability, sometimes.

His grandmother seems to notice his arrival, flipping the switch to off. She looks down at his arms.

“Oh, you finally got your jacket back, dear.” She said, “Where did you leave it again?”

“At a friend’s house.” He replied. Sebastian was definitely not a friend, but he didn’t wanna bother explaining the story to her.

She squinted down at the bouquet, which Alex had nearly forgotten he was holding. “What are those for?” She asked.

Alex froze in place.   
  
“Uh, they’re for you.” He lies, offering her the flowers.   
  
“Oh my, really?” She said, picking them up. “You didn’t have to.”

“I think Idid!” He assures her, vocal pitch raising slightly.

“No, dear, you really didn’t have to. You know I grow these outside, don’t you?” His grandmother said.

Alex fidgets with a stray strand of hair. “I guess I didn’t pay attention, sorry.”

“That’s quite alright.” She pats her grandson on the shoulder. “I’ll get a vase for these.”

Alex takes her exit as an opportunity to sneak in his room. He lets out a sigh as his door shuts behind him. He takes a seat on his bed, throwing his clothes beside it. Why did he lie to his grandma about the flowers? He questions. And why did he feel so guilty about doing it?

Really, he had done nothing wrong. He accepted a gift from a friend. He sensed no ill intent from Sam. He genuinely thought Alex wanted flowers, and so he bought some for him. It was simple, straightforward and to the point. So why did it bother him? There was no issue here.

And yet...

Frustrated, Alex pulled his phone out of his pocket. He texts Haley a short message, asking to go to her place. More telling her than asking her, really. If there was anything to rely on, it was Haley’s ability to never stop talking his ear off. While it was usually annoying, it’s exactly what he needed tonight.

* * *

Alex lets himself in, too used to this place it even knock on the door anymore. Haley is sitting backwards on the couch, arms draped around the back, neck craned to the right so she can watch her sister cooking in the kitchen. So focused, she doesn’t notice Alex entering.

“What’s up?” He asks, hands in the pockets of his jacket.

Haley jolts up, turning around. “Oh, hey!” She said, “I didn’t expect you to be here so early.”

“Alex? Did you want anything to eat?” Emily shouts from the kitchen.

“Nah, I’m good.” He shouts back. They must still be making dinner. Emily does have later work hours, so it makes sense. Though, compared to his grandparents eating at 4:30pm everyday, anything seems late to him.

He sits next to Haley, leaning onto the armrest. It isn’t long before Emily sets a plate on the coffee table. It’s chicken over brown rice with some kind of tomato sauce on top. Haley doesn’t hesitate to dig in, taking characteristically tiny bites. Emily enters her own room, leaving the two to themselves.

“Ugh, I wish she would just use white rice.” The girl beside him complained.

Alex sighed loud enough for her to hear. He really wishes her parents had taught her manners at some point.

“Brown rice is better for you, anyway.” He said.

“But it doesn’t taste as good.” She replied, pouting. “I wish my sister would stop making gross health food.”

“Are you kidding? I’d pay money to have Emily cook stuff like this for me.”   
  
“Yeah? Well, why don’t you?” Haley asked, her brows furrowed.

“I never said I had money _to_ pay with...” He answered sheepishly.

With a roll of her eyes, Haley continues to eat her food in silence. Alex takes a look around the house. He’s always envied the two for having one bigger than his. Emily had an entire room dedicated to her sewing supplies. He would put workout equipment there, personally, if he owned the place.

There’s a clang of metal against porcelain as Haley sets down her empty plate. She delicately dabs the sauce off of her face with a napkin, as to not mess up her makeup. She stretches her arms out in front of her, yawning.

“So, what do you wanna do? I still have Legally Blonde on Blu-ray if you wanna watch.” She offered.

Alex shook his head, not wanting to watch the film for a 3rd time. “I just came over to talk, actually.”   
  


The girl’s eyes light up at hearing that. “Really?”

Before giving him a chance to answer, she grabs his arm and drags him to her bedroom. She takes a seat on her bed, patting the spot next to her. Alex follows her lead, sitting beside her. She grins from ear to ear.

“You never wanna gossip with me, Alex! I can’t believe you finally asked.” She claps her hands together in excitement.

“Uh... I’m not sure if gossip is what I wanted, but...” he said, sinking into her comforter.

“So, I’m pretty sure I saw mayor Lewis sneaking out of Marnie’s ranch yesterday, acting super sus...” She began.

“Oh, is that so.” Alex replied, a clear lack of interest in his voice.

“Yeah! And when I asked, he, like, totally started acting nervous too.” Haley added.

He wonders if she would be gossiping about a 60 year old man’s love life if she weren’t living in a town as small as this. Knowing Haley... maybe.

“What about you? You hear any good rumors lately?” She asked.

“Not really. I kinda wanted to talk because I had a question I wanted to ask, actually.” He responded.

“Shoot!” Said Haley, leaning back on to her pillows.

Alex paused, trying to find a roundabout way to ask. “Has anyone ever gotten you flowers before?”

“Are you offering to?” She replied, fluttering her eyelashes.

“No.”

She frowns. “Well, maybe you should sometime.”   
  
“I’m being serious here, c’mon.” Alex sighed.

“I am too!”

Alex shut his eyes, brows furrowed. “What I mean is, like...” he turns to look her in the eye, “How would you react if another girl got you flowers?”  
  
“Another girl? Hmm...” she grabs her chin, looking off into the distance. “I would be suspicious, for sure.”

Alex’s breath hitches in his throat. Maybe he _was_ right to feel the way he felt.

“If it’s another girl, that probably means she has an ulterior motive, like,” she continued, talking with her hands, “she’s probably trying to gift her way into being friends with me, so we become closer, right? But she does it so she can steal my skincare routine and become prettier than I am.”

Alex’s hope is immediately diminished.

“But the joke is on her, because the secret to my beauty is actually my good bone structure.” She concluded, looking to Alex for approval.

“Okay... could I hear what a non-conceited person would think now?” He asks.

Haley slaps him on the shoulder. “Who are _you_ calling conceited? You realize that you’re the one who made me take naked pictures of you flexing so you could put them into a photo album you keep under your bed, right?”

“I was not _naked_ , alright? I had shorts on.” He rebutted.

“Yeah, cause that makes it so much better.” She said, shaking her head. “You’re the one who asked me the question! What do you want me to say?”

Alex exhales, his shoulders sinking. Maybe the best thing would be to come right out and say it. Being vague was just frustrating to both of them.

“Okay, so...” he stares at the blank walk in front of him, chewing on the inside of his lip. “Another guy gave me flowers and I don’t know how to feel about it.” He uttered, words spilling out all at once, at a speed so fast it rivaled even Haley’s word vomit.

“Ooh.”  
  
Alex snuck a nervous glance at the blonde. Her lips were pursed. He could practically hear the gears in her head moving. Each second of silence made him more anxious.

“Was it like... in a gay way?” She questioned.

Alex had been avoiding that word the entire day. Hearing it so suddenly felt like a smack in the face.

“What... would a gay way be?” He asked, fearing the answer.   
  
“I mean, like, did he kiss you on the lips before giving them to you?” said Haley.

“Wh-“ He sputters, “No! He did not do that!”

“I’m not sure, then.” She shrugs, “Could mean anything.”

“That’s what I wanted you to figure out!”   
  
Haley twirls a lock of hair between her fingertips. “You gotta tell me the details, then.” She said, “Who gave them to you?”

“I don’t want to say.” 

“Oh c’mon! I thought we were besties.” Haley pouted, “We tell each other everything.”

“I don’t want you acting weird around him.” He said. They were neighbors, so chances are they interact pretty regularly.

“I prooomise that I won’t!” Haley pleaded, literally getting on her knees and begging him. “So please tell me.”

Alex crossed his arms, letting out a breath. “Fine, I’ll tell you.”

Haley squeed in excitement, planting herself directly next to the man. “Who is it? Who is it?” She asked, her voice practically in his ear.

“It was Sam.”

“Oh!” She said, losing a majority of the energy she had had a few seconds ago.   
  
They sat in silence for a minute or two. Alex continued to glance at Haley, who’s lack of words was about to make him have a panic attack.

“Well?” He asked expectantly.

“Hmm...” She looked at the ceiling, fidgeting with the hem of her skirt. “He’s not the least attractive guy in Stardew, but I don’t think he’s the most attractive either...”

“Haley, I didn’t tell you who it was so you could judge his looks.” He says, regretting his decision to tell her more and more with every word she uttered.

“I’m just saying! You never wanna aim too low.”  
  
“I’m not ‘aiming’ for anything!” He insisted, losing his patience. “I just wanted to know if it meant something or not.”

“Hmm, well,” Haley began, tilting her head to one side, “he’s always been a pretty open guy. I think he would tell you upfront if he had any kind of reason for it.”

“Really?”

She nodded.

She turned to him, a grin on her lips. “Why? Did you want it to mean something?” She teased.

“What? No!” He urged.

The girl let out a high pitched giggle. “I’m just messing with you.”

Alex scowled. “Stop doing that, please.”

“I don’t think I can help myself.” She shook her head, smile still looming on her face. “Really, though, I don’t think I’ve ever seen you overthink something like this. You usually underthink stuff, if anything.”

“I don’t know why I’m doing this either.” He confesses.

She looks at him sympathetically. She puts an arm around his shoulder, pulling him into a half-hug.   
  
“I’m glad your brain is getting some activity, at least.” said Haley. Alex rolls his eyes at that.

“Thank you for asking me for help, too. I know it’s not that easy.” She adds, her tone sincere.

With that, Alex feels like a weight has been lifted off his chest. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> my writing is literally like 99% dialogue in this fhfhdghjn im so sorry


	3. the sad one

Alex has been doing his best to not think hard about anything this week. Normally that was his default setting, but after the talk with Haley, he’s been having second thoughts about everything. Elliott had stopped to ask him the time the other day, and the athlete took about 45 seconds to register what the words meant. Elliott went on to tell a story of how he lost his pocket watch in the sand, which Alex had to ask him to repeat at least twice.

Even working out was a struggle. He had nearly dropped the barbell on himself too many times to count, his mind wandering elsewhere. He had taken down most of the posters in his bedroom, uncomfortable under the stares of all the bodybuilders on the walls. He was wondering if he should see Harvey for this, considering it was hindering his ability to function.

He began to blank out again, staring at a shelve in JojaMart. His grandmother had asked him to get a bag of sugar. But there were so many kinds. Brown sugar. Light brown sugar. Confectioners sugar. Stevia sugar. Was his grandpa diabetic? Maybe they should switch to stevia sugar. But, then again, it probably wouldn’t taste as good. It would probably be healthier, though. Or maybe fake sugar was bad for your body? Alex sits and ponders it.

He pauses as he hears footsteps from the other side of the aisle. Sure enough, there’s two people who turn the corner into his current aisle- Sam and his mom. He debates whether or not he should just leave now. It’s probably too late, they’ve already seen him.

Confirming his thoughts, Sam greets him.

“Hey!”

“Hi.” He replies, gaze still affixed on the shelf.

“Hello, Alex.” His mother says from beside him.

Alex wishes that the conversation would end there, but alas, it seems the two are looking for a conversation.

“I don’t think I’ve ever seen you shopping here before.” Sam said.

“My grandma was busy, so she asked me to do some shopping for her.” Alex explained, glancing at them from the corner of his eye.

“Aw, that’s sweet of you to do.” Jodi gushes. She scowls, turning her attention to Sam. “I wish _someone_ would offer to get my groceries for me.” She jabs a finger onto his chest.

Sam puts up his hands innocently. “Hey, I try to come with you, at least.”

Alex gets a funny feeling in his chest as he watches them. He’s not sure how to describe it. It almost feels like... yearning?

“Do you need any help, honey?” The woman asked, stepping closer to him and placing a hand on his shoulder.

He blinks a few times, mind still fuzzy. He takes a few seconds to process what she asked him.

“She said she needed sugar... but I dunno what kind to get.” He said.

“Sugar? What’s she baking with it?”

“She wanted to make cookies.” He replied.

“Alright...” Jodi looks at the shelf, pointing at the bags with her index finger. “For chocolate chip cookies, you need granulated sugar,” she points at a blue bag, “and brown sugar.” she points at a purple bag.

“Oh, okay.” He puts the blue bag in his basket, hesitating as he reaches for the purple bag. “What’s the difference between light brown sugar and dark brown sugar?”

“Well...” Jodi said, lips pressed together in concentration, “the darker it is, the more molasses it has in it.”

Alex is stumped. He doesn’t think he’s even seen molasses, let alone tasted it. He looks over at Sam, who just shrugs in response, clearly having no idea what it is either. Alex grabs the dark brown sugar, deciding via eeny meeny miny moe. His grandma could work with whatever he got for her, surely.

Jodi and Sam walk past him, continuing their shopping, stopping at the end of the aisle to get cooking oil. They turn into the next one. Alex wanders over to the flour, the next thing on his list. He groans as he looks down, seeing about 4 different types of it. Did he need cake flour or all purpose flour? Maybe bread flour?

His thoughts are interrupted, hearing Sam and Jodi’s voices again.

“You do not need fruit snacks! You are a grown man!”

“They’re for Vince, relax.”

“Sam, Vincent has never liked fruit snacks. I know you’re the one who eats them.”

“And? It’s not my fault that they taste so good.”

The feeling is returning, a bit stronger this time. He doesn’t like it. He shakes his head, turning his attention back to the shelf in front of him.

Flour. He needs flour.

He reads the fine print on the bag, squinting at it. There’s not much information. Only the weight and ounces.

“Okay, so, I get yelled at for buying fruit snacks, but it’s fine for you to get a tub of licorice?”

Jodi snorts, stifling a laugh.

“You can’t even keep a straight face!”

She giggles, unable to respond.

“At least try to defend yourself!”

“‘It’s not my fault they taste so good _’_.” She responded, imitating Sam’s voice.

They both chuckle at that.

Their laughter reverberates throughout his brain. Alex grits his teeth together. The feeling was quickly evolving from uneasiness to bitterness. He wanted to get out of here as soon as possible. He carelessly tosses a bag of flour into his basket at random.

He makes his way to the medicine aisle to buy his grandfather some pain killers. He puts a few into the basket, knowing that they’ll go through it quickly. He browses the cough drops, wondering if he should buy some now that it was getting colder.

Despite trying to keep himself distracted, his mind lingers on what he had heard earlier. It reminded him of his own visits to the store with his mother. She would scold him for picking out sugary snacks, claiming his dentist would be upset with her if she let him get any. He always volunteered to carry all of the bags, wanting to prove his strength to her. He remembers dropping a bag on his foot once, and crying out in pain, his mother unable to hold back her laughter as she tried to kissed the pain away.

His grip on the handle of the basket tightened, knuckles turning white. He should stop thinking about this. It was only getting him more worked up. He stared at the fluorescent ceiling lights, in an attempt to keep his tears at bay. He felt stupid for even crying at this, especially in public.

Would she still shop with him like this? He thinks that he would have gone through his rebellious phase, too embarrassed to be seen with her, like most kids. He’s weirdly thankful that he never got to that point. He can’t imagine the guilt of pushing away his mother in her last few years of life.   
  
Her last few years of life. The words feel gross to say.   
  
He looks back at the cough drops. He wants to get some. There’s a variety of flavors. He stares at the cherry ones.

He would eat this particular flavor like candy as a child. Against his mother’s wishes, of course. By the time he had eaten all of them, there were none for when he was actually sick.

He used to get sick quite a bit, too. He didn’t mind it. It was time away from school, after all. Having his mother dote on him was an added bonus.

Alex tried his best, when she was sick, too. There wasn’t much he could do. No one could do much, really. She passed away in a hospital, on a night when Alex was away from her. Was she disappointed he wasn’t there, in her last few moments? The questioned had weighed on his mind for years.

Cough drops. He wanted cough drops.

Alex reached for it, hesitating. Why was he hesitating? They’re just cough drops.

“Yo.” He hears Sams voice next to him, interrupting his thoughts.

He doesn’t want to respond. He’s thinking too hard to speak. What if he just ignores him? Maybe he’ll give up and leave.

“You good?”

Alex glowered, getting annoyed now. Can he not take a hint? Why did he insist on talking to him? He made it clear that he wanted nothing to do with him, didn’t he?

“Alex?” Concerned leaked into his voice now.

“What?!” Alex shouts, voice cracking. He glared at the other boy, mouth formed into a snarl.

Sam nearly jumps from the sudden aggression, taken aback. 

“Um, are you alright?” He asked, voice growing more worried.

Alex fully turns to face him. His hands feel numb. “I’m fine! I’m completely fine!” He said, “You don’t need to keep checking on me!”

Sam takes a step back, bringing his hands to his chest defensively.

“I never asked for your help, so leave me alone! Please, just leave me fucking alone!” Alex spit out, words sounding both manic and malicious.

Sam is almost at the other end of the aisle, walking backwards.  
  


“Okay... I’m sorry.” He quietly says, voice faltering.

Alex continues to glare at him, watching him leave the area. He walks to the checkout, slamming his basket down on the conveyer. The cashier is too scared to speak, calculating his change in silence. Her hands shake as she hands him the coins.

  
  


Alex doesn’t say a word as he walks into the house. He’s trying to hold it together, just long enough for him to get to his room. Thankfully, his grandparents don’t make an attempt to speak to him.   
  
He rips off his jacket it, throwing it onto the floor. He felt like he was sweating. He opened a window.

He sits in his bed, the frame of it squeaking under his weight. He holds his face in the palms of his hands. He doesn’t feel like crying anymore. Which honestly is worse, because at least if he cried he would probably feel better.

His phone rings from atop his night stand. He picks it up. It’s Haley calling. He sets it to silent.

His reflection stares back at him in the polished hardwood floor. He doesn’t like how it’s looking at him. He pulls his eyes away, diverting his attention the the bookshelf.

His phone vibrates. He doesn’t have to look to know it’s Haley. She’s the only one who still calls him, anyway.   
  


His head feels like it’s pounding. He lays down, first on his side, but switching to lie his stomach. Alex buried his head in his pillow.

The phone vibrates again. Why won’t she just give it up? He’s not in the right state to talk to her. Or anyone, for that matter.

By the 9th time it rings, Alex is irritated enough to pick up.

“What do you want?” He asked, tone as even as he could make it.

“Why are you avoiding me?” Haley replied, obviously not too pleased herself.

“I’m not. I don’t want to talk right now.”

She scoffs. “You could have at least, oh, I dunno, sent me a text so I wouldn’t have to call you 80 times?”

“Why did you call me so many times to begin with? You should have gotten the hint by the third time, at least.”

“ _Gotten the hint?_ ” She repeated. “Alex, I was worried about you.”

His patience was growing thin. “Well, clearly I’m fine. So stop calling me.”

“What is _wrong_ with you?”

Alex wasn’t really sure himself, to be fair. “Just leave me be. Please.”

There’s a pause before she responds.

“... There’s gotta be something going on with you right now.”

“There is. I’m getting annoyed because you won’t _listen_ to what I’m saying.” His anger was beginning to unfurl now.

“I’m not listening? Maybe it’s because I can’t believe you would me talk to me like this.”

“Oh my god, Haley _please_ just follow directions, for once in your life.”

“Excuse me?”

“ _Leave me alone._ It’s very simple, even you can do it.”

Haley is at a loss for words. Even Alex winces at his phrasing.

“What the fuck?” She asks, more rhetorically rather than being aimed at anyone.

“I-“

“You’re an asshole.” Is all she says before hanging up.

Alex tosses the phone on his bed in frustration. It bounces off the mattress, landing on to the ground. He pinched his temple, trying to sort out where this goes on his list of current problems.


	4. Chapter 4

Despite only getting a couple hours of sleep, Alex has been in bed all day. He’s been hugging his pillow against his chest since 7am, feeling sorry for himself. His grandma had come to check up on him earlier, he pretended to be asleep so she would leave.

He checked his phone every 30 minutes, hoping for a text from Haley. She remained silent. He just hopes she’ll accept his apology, when he gains enough confidence to give her one. 

The clock on his phone screen reads “2:37”. He’d normally be at Haley’s house right now, since it’s a Wednesday. Haley insists that they watch the reruns of Gossip Girl every week. He doesn’t like it very much, but it makes her happy, at least.

He groans as he hears a knock at the door. His grandmother peeks her head in, a bit of worry showing upon her aged face. Alex takes a deep breath, preparing for the questions she must have. There’s no possible way out of this.

“Alex, dear?” She says delicately, as if not trying to alarm him.

“Yeah, Grams?” 

“One of your friends is at the door, they want to speak with you.”

Shit. Well, he didn’t expect it this soon.   
  
“Gimme a couple minutes, I’ll be right there.” He replied, forcing himself to sit up.

The door closed softly. Alex throws on a pair of jeans and his usual jacket. He didn’t want to bother with his hair today, but he’s sure it looks rough. Whatever. He wasn’t trying to impress anyone.

He exits his room cautiously, almost scared to see what’s outside of it. As it turns out, he was right to be.

Sam is standing in the entry way, having a conversation with his grandfather. He was expecting the visitor to be Haley, not him. George is looking as perturbed at ever. It was to be expected, he hated strangers. Well, Sam was technically a neighbor, so not really a stranger? Maybe he just hated everyone?

“So you just wear your hair like that? Why?” His grandfather rudely asked.

“Um, yeah? I like how it looks.” Sam replies.

George shook his head. “Tch. You kids are weird. Back in my day, men were all expected to have crew cuts. Of course, that was mostly due to the war, but...”

Sam laughs awkwardly at that, clearly trying his best to be polite. A difficult task, Alex must admit.

Sam notices Alex and relief washes over his face.   
  


“Hi, Alex!” He said.

  
Alex frowns, not meeting his eyes. “Hey.”

“Did you two boys want to stay for lunch?” His grandmother asked. Alex prays to Yoba that Sam says no.

“No thanks, I wanted to go for a walk, actually.” Sams gaze turns back to Alex, who cannot possibly say no to this in front of his grandmother.

“...Sure.” He replies, mentally preparing himself for whatever confrontation was coming. Hey, maybe now Sam would actually fight him.

Sam steps out the door first, pausing to turn around and see if Alex is following. Alex sighs, walking out the door himself. This feels like the calm before the storm.

“Follow me.” Sam instructed.

Alex didn’t object, continuing to follow his lead. They walked past Dusty’s kennel, then past the saloon. Alex stops for a second to look at Haley’s house as they go by it. He feels a pull of guilt in his chest.

They enter the woods, taking a turn when they reach Marnie’s ranch. Alex doesn’t really see this place very often. Maybe he should come around more. Sam stops when he reaches the end of a pond. His reflection is wavering in the water.

“I like to take walks around here this time of year.” He said, looking down at it.

Alex doesn’t respond. The suspense of it all was killing him. He wishes Sam would get this over with.

“So, I brought you out here to apologize. I felt really bad after yesterday. But, I don’t... exactly know what I did wrong?” He said.

Alex doesn’t know what it say to that. He wasn’t exactly wrong. He really had no reason to apologize in the first place.

“I guess I can be a handful sometimes, so if that’s why you got mad, then I’m sorry.” Sam continues, “If it wasn’t that, I’d kinda like to know... what it was? Cause I genuinely have no idea.”

Alex feels shitty for making him believe this was his fault. Explaining the actual reason would probably be embarrassing, but he supposes it must be done.

“You didn’t do anything wrong, Sam.” He began, “My anger had nothing to do with you personally. To tell you the truth... I was mad because I got jealous.”

“Jealous? Of me?” Sam pointed at himself, as if to clarify.

Alex nodded.

“What could you possibly be jealous of? Like, maybe my skateboarding skills, I guess, but I wouldn’t mind teaching you if you asked.”

“No, it wasn’t like that. It’s kind of weird to say out loud but... I was jealous of your mom.” Alex scratches the back of his neck as he says it, trying his best to not look at the other boy.

“My _mom?_ ” Sam said, eyebrows fully raised.

Alex bites his lip. This definitely sounded bizarre to everyone but him.

“Um, look...” Sam seemed to be embarrassed himself, “I know my dad is like... out of the picture for now, but.... you can’t just...”

Alex is confused for a few seconds. His eyes widen in realization as he puts together what Sam is saying.

“Oh my god, no, no, no, that’s not what I meant by that at all.”

“Really? Phew. Thank Yoba, I don’t have to have that conversation.”

There’s an awkward pause after that. Well, this was a hard misunderstanding to come back from. It’s certainly not what Alex had been expecting this meeting to be like. It makes him question whether or not he wants to fully explain it at all.

Sam breaks the silence. “Can I ask what you really meant about being jealous of my mom?”

“Ah...” The somber mood returned. “I was jealous of you having one. That’s all.”

Sam looked at him sympathetically. Alex continued to stare at the water, refusing to acknowledge it. Alex watched the reflection as Sam’s figure inched closer to him, putting a comforting arm around his back.

“I didn’t know, Alex. I’m sorry.” He said, “By the time I moved here, you were already living with your grandparents. I never put 2 and 2 together, I guess.”

“I try not to tell people about it, so... not your fault.” Alex insists.

He had been about 8 years old when he first moved into the valley. Sam must have been around 12 or 13 when his family moved from the city. He remembers seeing them move in, a box truck in their driveway filled with furniture. A very tired looking Jodi trying to herd her toddler. He can’t say he remembers Sam’s father very well, who was sent overseas not even a year after moving in.

“Are you gonna be alright?” Sam asked.

Alex sighs. “Yeah, it just kinda triggered something in me, Y’know? But I’m doing better today.”

“I get it. Take all the time you need to calm down.”

Alex is thankful that he doesn’t seem to hold anything against him from yesterday. He isn’t sure if Haley will behave the same, however. He still worries about that.

Sam’s body is still pressed on his, something he thinks his brain has been trying to avoid fully registering. He should probably move. But it was pretty cold, and he did welcome the warmth. Winter was right around the corner and he could see his breath in the air.

“Hey, Sam, are you familiar with girls?”

“Like the concept of them? I am.”

Alex rolls his eyes. “Okay, shut up, you know what I mean. Do you have any _friends_ who are girls?” He rephrases.

“Uh-huh.”

“What do you do to apologize to them? I said some mean things to Haley over the phone yesterday and I think she hates me now.”

Sam stares into the distance. “Hmm... Well, I try my best to avoid saying mean things, but... There was this one time Penny was upset with me; I decided to take Vince home before his lesson was over, and she got angry.”

“What did you do to fix it?”

“I got her some poppies and told her I was sorry. It seemed like it worked fine.”

Alex turns to him, an eyebrow raised. “So you’re really just out here giving bouquets of flowers to everyone, huh? And I thought the farmer was bad...”

Sam looks back at him, puzzled. “What? What do you mean?”

Alex crosses his arms, turning the other way. “I thought I was special...” He jests.

“All of my friends are special, Alex.” He replies so seriously that it makes Alex’s heart ache.   
  
“I’m kidding. Forget what I said.” Alex said, feeling a bit awkward now that Sam doesn’t get the joke he was going for.

“So you just got her some flowers? Haley does like gifts, so that might work.” He continues, changing the subject.

“You gotta make sure to say sorry, too.” Sam responded.

“Yeah, yeah, yeah.” Alex said dismissively, “Where did you get the flowers you got for me? We’ll just get more of those.”

“Um... Well, I’ll show you.”

Sam breaks apart from him, turning around. He walks north, back towards the woods entrance. He approaches a red silo stationed in Marnie’s front lawn. A patch of a few dozen sunflowers was planted in the soil.

“Leah told me that she finds lots of stuff in the woods that she takes home, so I picked some of these over here.” Sam explained.

Alex looks at the other man in horror. “Sam... this is literally Marnie’s garden.”

Sam bites down in his lower lip, not meeting his eyes. “Oh.... Really....”

“You said you _bought_ me those flowers!”

“Yeah, well, it sounded better than saying I found them from the forest.”

“ _Found_? You mean stole?”

“I mean... is it really her property, though? It’s a huge forest out here.” Sam is awful at lying.

“What drove you to do this?” Alex asks, wondering what could possibly make this polite man commit thievery.

Sam puts his hands in the pockets of his denim jacket, huffing. “If mayor Lewis wants to threaten to take my skateboard, I’ll steal his girlfriend’s flowers, I don’t care.”

Alex bursts into laughter. He had never seen the petty side of Sam, but he definitely enjoyed it.

“He threatened to take it? Why?” He questioned.

Sam sighed. “I accidentally hit the ceramic pot on the neighbors front lawn and cracked it.” He explained, “But Emily wasn’t even angry about it! So I don’t know why Lewis had to make a big deal of the thing.”

“Well, you’re more than welcome to skate in my driveway-“ Alex cuts himself off before he finishes that thought, “Actually, maybe not. My grandpa would probably throw a fit.”

“Your grandpa is definitely very-“

“Grouchy, rude, moody?”

“I was gonna say ‘old fashioned’, but...”

Alex shrugs. “He’s a bit better once he warms up to you.”

“I can’t say I agree with his comments about my hair. In fact, I might grow it out more to spite him.” Sam was a bit more malevolent than Alex had first assumed.

“How long are you thinking?”

“However long it needs to be.” Sam is firm in his answer.

“You might not want to go too long, I’ll end up confusing you with Haley.” He joked. “This town isn’t big enough for two blonde bombshells, that’s what she always says.”

“I’m glad you think I’d be a bombshell, at least.”

Alex chooses to ignore that comment, instead focusing his attention back on the flowers. There’s a few spots of empty soil, where he assumes plants were uprooted. Most of them are mismatched, with every one missing one or two petals.

“Sam, I don’t want to steal this poor woman’s flowers.” He insists.

“Let me do it, then.” Sam pushed past Alex, kneeling down. He began break the stems of the sunflowers.

Alex turns to look to his left, then his right. He’s praying to god that no one is witnessing this right now. He isn’t sure how he’d even explain himself in this situation. He was basically an accomplice at this point, wasn’t he?   
  
“Hold these.” Sam shoved a fistful of flowers up towards the other man.   
  
Alex takes them, dusting off some of the dirt that’s still stuck to the sides. Sam hands him more, one by one, until a set of 12 is in his hands.   
  


“I’m really going to apologize with stolen flowers.” He reminds himself once again. “Haley isn’t gonna forgive me, is she?”

“It’ll be fine, trust me.” Sam assured him, wiping off his hands on his pants.

They both swing around as they hear the door of the ranch creak open. The two sprint to the other side of the silo, nearly tripping over one another’s legs. They stand with their backs pressed against the brick of the structure. Alex peeks around the corner. Marnie is outside, heading back towards town.   
  
“Do you think she noticed us?” Sam whispers.

“I sure hope not!” Alex replies, watching her figure get more and more distant. He finally lets out a breath of relief when she takes a turn towards the saloon.

Alex looks down at the ground. His shoes and the hem of his pants are covered in mud. He groans. He _hated_ getting his clothes dirty.

“My shoes are a mess...” he states.   
  


Sam looks at them. “They’re not that bad.”

“What do you mean, they’re completely...” Alex pauses as he looks at Sam’s shoes, which are in even worse condition. They’re not only muddy, but also have holes in them.

“Hmm?”

“Your shoes... they have holes in them.” Alex informs him.

Sam looks down at his shoes. “Yeah, they do. I should probably get a new pair.”

Alex doesn’t respond, continuing to stare at them.

“I only have one pair, so they get worn out pretty easily. Well, I do have a pair of loafers, but I only wear those at, like, funerals and stuff.” Sam explained. He turned to Alex, a brow raised. “Aren’t you a gridball player or something? Why are you so upset by this?”

Alex scoffs. “I have cleats for that, thank you very much. And I take very good care of them, too-” He stops himself from saying anything more. He’s being rude again. “Sorry.”

“It’s alright.”

“Really, I don’t know why I’m getting so combative over shoes.” Alex shook his head. “I’ve been so moody lately.”

“Is something the matter?” Sam asks.

He sighed. “I dunno, I can’t explain it. Don’t worry about it.”

While he did value his image quite a bit, he had been acting irrationally insecure as of late. His confident facade was cracking at the seams, and he hated it. Worse of all, people were recognizing this. He hadn’t spent years faking it to have it all broken down so quickly.

Haley was his one pillar of support, and he had knocked her down. He stares back down at the bouquet in his hands. He was nervous to apologize. Ultimately, they had been friends too long to have their relationship broken apart over something so small, but that didn’t mean this would be easy to fix.

“I gotta tell Haley sorry, but... I’m kinda scared.” He confesses.

“Scared of what?”

“I don’t know. Being yelled at?”

“Do you want me to come with you?”

“No, it’ll be weird if we go together. This is a one-on-one situation.”

“Hmm...” Sam purses his lips, thinking. “What if I just happen to be nearby? You know, inconspicuously.”

“You really wanna help me that badly?” Alex presses.

“Of course, why wouldn’t I?” Sam replied, “If you’re really in as bad of trouble as you’re making it sound like, I wanna make sure you’re okay.”

Alex takes a step forward, motioning Sam to follow him. “Let’s get this over with, then.” He said.

* * *

Alex has been standing at Haley’s front door for about 7 minutes now. Sam is skateboarding back and forth behind him. He’s not sure if this is the _most_ inconspicuous activity he could be doing, but he insisted that this was a regular activity of his, and his neighbors were used to it.

He stops to watch Sam complete a successful kickflip. Skateboarding was actually kind of cool. Sam notices his gaze and offers him an encouraging thumbs up.

Alex cracks his neck from side to side, finally choosing to make his move. He knocks gently at the door, three times in total. He doesn’t hear anything at first. He almost feels relieved, until the knob begins to turn.

It’s Haley who answers the door, and she doesn’t look happy at all. She crosses her arms, glaring at him.   
  
“Um, hi Haley.” Alex said, giving her a nervous smile. 

She doesn’t return it. “What?”

He gulped. “Uh, I’ve been thinking about what I said yesterday, and, um, I wanted to say sorry.”

“Mm hmm.” She still looks pissed.

“It was rude, it was disrespectful, and I d-“

Sam crashes behind him, landing with a thud. Both Haley and Alex pause to watch him get back up and dust off his clothes. He picks up the skateboard, slipping it under his arm. He glances at the two, quickly looking away. He begins to whistle, walking back towards his house.

It takes a few moments before Haley speaks up again.

“...You were saying?”

“Oh, uh,” Alex turns his attention back towards her. “I got you flowers.”

Haley takes the sunflowers from his hands, cradling them in her arms. “Flowers...?”

“Uh huh.”

“I gotta admit, this is a step in the right direction...”

Alex holds his breath.

“... But it’s not enough for me to forgive you.”

He closed his eyes, the breath escaping his lungs.

“What else can I do?” He asked.

“I dunno... this feels like a situation only a shopping trip with my best friend would make me forget...”

Alex sighed. He hated spending hours watching her try on clothes at the mall, but if it would fix things, he might have to agree.   
  


“A shopping trip?” He reiterated.

“Uh huh.” Haley nods.

“...If I have to do it for you to forgive me, then I guess I’ll go.” He concedes.

“You better! You ruined my entire plan for this afternoon, you know that?”

“Yeah, yeah, I’m sorry.”

“This weekend. If you don’t show then I’m putting your weird pictures on the bulletin board by Pierres.” She says, shutting the door before Alex can respond.

Well, it didn’t go as badly as he thought it would. He definitely didn’t wanna go on that trip, but if it would fix everything, then it had to be done. He looked back at Sam, who had given up skateboarding entirely just to eavesdrop on the conversation. He gives him a thumbs up. Sam grins, returning the gesture.


End file.
